Alexandria

oK so it probably could, or should, be better. But I’m really fricken excited about it. I’m proud of myself!

I sucked in high school, and always brought home disappointing grades. Maybe some of that can be blamed on untreated MS, but I was really depressed throughout high school and in pain and I just really didn’t care, or try. And my brother was the type that could good grades without really trying.

I feels AMAZING to be proud of my work, and to have a GPA I can brag about. I may have sucked in high school, but I’m kicking butt now. take THAT high school teachers who thought I wasn’t going to do well. Take that MS! You may make everything 10X harder, but that just makes me even more proud that I could pull it all off. Its lame, but I LOVE being the “smart” one, or the one teachers always look to at class because they know you probably know the right answer.

Yeah that’s right: I probably fell on my way walking to this class, and I may be on my 5th cup of coffee, but I DO know the answer!

Not to mention the deal I have with my father- 3.5 graduating GPA and we get matching tattoos :)

YAY.

Everyone go read this!

Its an article about how negative emotions release hormones that slow down your healing process.

And of course being positive and laughing and smiling releases all of those good hormones :)

So smile! Even if it hurts!

(here)

Is it weird that this makes me happy?

It feels like a little shout out! (ok so they don’t know or care about me, but they know/care enough about my disease enough to put it on its home page. Close enough!)

I also know i’m like, one of the five people left in the world still using AIM but whatever :)

Love you too, Yahoo!

This post is going to make me sound like a terrible Person, but I don’t care.

I realized the other day that my next infusion is scheduled during mothers day. My mother has been taking me to my infusions. I will be with my mother on mothers day.

We have never really gotten along. Shes was kind of a nutty alcoholic when I lived with her, and has always been kind of awful. We’re working on our relationship, its just hard for me to forget some of the things she has done in the past. I still cant say “I love you” to her.

Which makes mothers day hard. I know I have to be nice, and should probably get her some flowers. But shes gonna be mad if she thinks my gift or card isn’t good enough. And I don’t know what shes expecting. Our meetings are just always so stressful.

I don’t want to have a crazy, emotional, angry reunion. I just want to get in and out of my infusion, and take a nap.

Is that too much to ask for?

Good luck! I’m doing one here in Ottawa on Sunday. Can you post your donation page when you have it up and running?

Thank you!! And good luck to you too :)

This is our team/donation page linked with the event! yay!

oh hey did I tell you guys I started a team for the MS walk in Oneonta?

Its called Multiple Smiles :) get it?! lame, I know. I love it.

I’m actually really excited. And lucky to have such supportive people here in college!

Anyone ever get this?

I never know what to say.  I got a card today that said “I would love for you to come visit when you’re feeling better!”

How do I know when that’s going to happen? Its not like waiting for a cold to pass. I never know when a good day is coming on.

What if I don’t get better soon? I think that’s a question that makes people uncomfortable. And it makes me sound bitter. I know i’m reading too much into this, and I’m not bitter. At least not today, haha!

How do I tell my doctors I want better pain meds without sounding like an addict?

I get it. I’m young, maybe you dont think my pain is that bad, higher concentrated stuff is bad for you, people get addicted…

But Tramadol just isn’t cutting it. I’m afraid if I tell them that, they’re gonna think i’m a drug addict or a complainer.

When I told the new neurologist that I was feeling weaker and my pain was getting really bad she said “Well, we can tolerate the pain worsening, but I’m worried about the weakness”

I’m sorry…WE? I’m glad YOU can tolerate the pain, but I cant. Jerk.